New Office Terminology

• 404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. "Don't bother asking him; He's 404, man."
• ALPHA GEEK: The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group.
• BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
• CHAINSAW CONSULTANT: An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.
• CHIPS & SALSA: Chips = hardware, Salsa = software. "Well, first we gotta figure out if the problem is in your chips or your salsa."
• CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.
• FLIGHT RISK: Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave a company or department soon.
• IDEA HAMSTERS: People who always seem to have their idea generator running.
• MOUSE POTATO: The online, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
• OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake.
• PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the heck out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
• PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
• TOURISTS: People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs.
• YUPPIE FOOD STAMPS: The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out of ATMs everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after lunch. "We each owe $8, but all anybody's got are yuppie food stamps."